Introducing the Tom Brady Fan Club!

No, not an actual fan club.  Duh.  I am not THAT big of a loser.

 

The Tom Brady Fan Club (TBFC) is my kick-ass, sure to win a championship, fantasy football team!  Headlined by the golden boy himself.  Because obviously, the TBFC would be a stupid name without their namesake on the team.  Could you imagine if the quarterback of the TBFC was Eli Manning?  Yikes!

 

Anyways, carrying on, please meet the 2012 version of the TBFC!

 

Quarterback

Tom Brady, New England

Ryan Fitzpatrick, Buffalo

 

Thought Process: I will only need Fitzpatrick one week (yes, I know these sound like famous last words).  If I don’t like Fitzpatrick by the bye week, I will dump him for someone else.  You never know, Timmy T. might be starting for the Jets by then!

 

Running Back

Jamaal Charles, Kansas City

BenJarvus Green-Ellis, Cincinnati

Donald Brown, Indianapolis

Jonathon Dwyer, Pittsburgh

Ryan Williams, Arizona

 

Thought Process:  I hate running backs.  They get injured all the time and are such a crapshoot, which is partially why I did not take one until the third round.  I feel like every single one is a risk on some level, but they also have perks.  Charles could be great if he is back in top form; Green-Ellis has never fumbled (never meaning NEVER); Brown is going to be the starter and primary back, which adds up to carries; and Dwyer and Williams both stand to benefit from starters being out.

 

Wide Receiver

Julio Jones, Atlanta

Demaryius Thomas, Denver

Pierre Garcon, Washington

Reggie Wayne, Indianapolis

Mario Manningham, San Francisco

 

Thought Process:  I waited until the fourth round to take my first wide receiver.  I don’t love my receivers, but I also don’t hate them.  And based on where I actually got them in the draft, I feel like I got good value.  In other words . . . we’ll see.

 

Tight End

Jimmy Graham, New Orleans

Jared Cook, Tennessee

 

Thought Process:  Unless you have Graham AND Gronkowski . . . my tight ends are better than yours.

 

Kicker & Defense

Matt Bryant, Atlanta

Cincinnati Bengals

 

Thought Process:  I took my kicker in the third to last round (simply because I needed one before they were all gone), and my defense in the very last round.  Last year, I felt like my receivers and running backs won/lost me more games than my kicker/defense, so I just don’t think they are that important.  As far as defense goes, last year we drafted the Packers (who were supposed to be good, but ended up being a total bust), and finished the year out alternating between Seattle and Cincinnati (undrafted), both of who performed just fine.  If the Bengals don’t work out this year, I am fairly confident that I can find a decent undrafted team, so I was not wasting an early pick on a defense.

 

And there you have it.  Welcome to the world, 2012 TBFC!

 

via the New England Patriots on Pinterest

Things That Go Beep In The Night

First and foremost, this is a public service announcement.  From me to you.  NEVER purchase a Kidde smoke alarm or carbon monoxide detector.  I feel the need to share this information with you, because I hear Home Depot advertising these psychotic, possessed alarms on the radio on a regular basis.  And I know better.  Do not question me, just trust me.

The smoke detectors in this house and I have a very rocky relationship.  A little more than a year ago, shortly after we moved in, I was home alone and rudely woken in the middle of the night by every smoke detector in the house going off.  This includes the damn Kidde carbon monoxide detector, which helpfully shouted “Fire! Fire!” and “Warning: Carbon Monoxide!” repeatedly.  (Did you know fire alarms could talk?  Because until that day, I did not.)  I will spare you the gory details, but long story short, it took a 3 AM visit from the fire department and new batteries in every detector to finally shut off the alarms.  We had to get a replacement for the malfunctioning Kidde detector.  And I was left permanently traumatized with a paralyzing fear of all smoke detectors and anything that goes “beep” (including my mother’s dryer).

So, you can imagine how happy I was at 4 AM last night when, as I was enjoying a dreamless sleep, a very loud BEEP invaded my subconscious.  I made the mistake of opening my eyes, and was greeted once again by every smoke detector in the house.  Luckily Nathan was home from work this time, and the smoke detectors went off after about a minute.  Being a veteran of malfunctioning smoke detectors, I knew our best course of action was to do what worked last time, which was the battery replacement.  Hence a 4 AM Walmart run for 9 volt batteries.  We got the batteries replaced and were asleep by 5 AM.  And that was that.  Or SHOULD have been that.

So you can imagine how even more pleased I was when tonight, now that I am home alone for the weekend, one of the smoke detectors upstairs beeped loudly three times.  No windows open, no food cooking, nothing – I was just downstairs watching TV.  I could not believe this was happening to me again.  I briefly considered running to my mom & dad’s house for the weekend and leaving the house to fend for itself.  But then that would mean that I let the smoke detectors win. 

I couldn’t call the fire department for advice because for some reason they do not make their non-emergency line public.  If someone knows the number, please share!  I certainly was not calling 911.  Luckily, we have a good family friend who is a fire fighter, and luckily he was home when I called.  Apparently something that can happen commonly with smoke detectors is the membrane in them gets dirty, or blocked by something like a dust or creepy crawly spider, and that will set them off. 

So, Nathan’s friend Chris came over with his girlfriend to help.  He took down all three smoke alarms (one beeping in protest) and cleaned them out with the air compressor (loud beeping protests from all).  We thought we had identified two of the three as possible culprits, so I told him to only put one back up, and I took the batteries out of the other two.  Just as I am thinking how smart I am, both disconnected, battery-less smoke alarms start going off at random intervals.  And oddly enough, beeping noises then seemed to start coming from the holes in the ceiling.  And just to top off the sundae with a cherry, the one smoke alarm we had hooked back up decided to beep some more too.  WHY!?!?!?!?

So, all the smoke detectors went back up.  All three got reset, of course with lots of loud beeping and shouts of “FIRE! FIRE!” from the evil talking Kidde downstairs.  I am sure my neighbors were just loving me, as it was after midnight.  (It serves them right.  It’s called payback, people.)  Finally, all was quiet.  Chris, his girlfriend, and I were congratulating ourselves on a job well done.  And as they went to walk out the door, we heard a faint, but familiar “Beep!” from upstairs.

I give up.

Clearly these smoke detectors are possessed.  I don’t know how, but they know when I am home alone.  And why do they only go off in the middle of the night?  They win.  I have no other strategies up my sleeve besides beating all three smoke detectors with a baseball bat, but based on tonight I am not even sure that would work.  So, since it is now 1 AM, I am going to watch TV in the hopes that I will relax enough at some point to fall asleep, and that all will stay quiet.

And if I hear one more beep?  I am out of here, and this house is on its own!

Home Cooked Summer

I might have mentioned that with Nathan home this summer, I had to get creative with my cooking and learn some new recipes.  Before his injury, I only cooked dinner for both of us twice a week, he cooked on Monday nights, and the other four nights a week I got eat whatever junk I wanted.  Suddenly there were two of us at home seven nights a week, and my limited repertoire of recipes got really old, really fast.  I want to share some of the delicious, homemade recipes that we have tried recently.

I am particularly proud of a dinner that I made last week. I found this recipe from for spaghetti with sautéed chicken and grape tomatoes on Pinterest.  Due to lack of ingredients in my house, not caring about the calorie count, and frankly sheer laziness when it comes to cooking, I didn’t follow this recipe very well.  But that is exactly why I am so proud!  I took the general concept, changed it to suit my ingredients and cooking abilities, and it still turned out great!  We both loved it, it was super easy, and super filling – the three keys too a successful meal in my house!

I hate working with raw meat and am way too lazy to sauté chicken like the recipe says, so I used the pre-done frozen grilled chicken strips from Costco.  I also used regular spaghetti, because that is what I have (and also because pigs will fly before I purchase low carb pasta).  I also substituted minced garlic and garlic powder for garlic cloves, regular olive oil for extra virgin, and lemon pepper instead of regular black pepper.  Then I decided to sauté the tomatoes with all the seasonings that were supposed to go on the chicken (basil, oregano, salt, and pepper) in addition to the garlic.

   When everything was cooked, I just had to dump the spaghetti and chicken in with the tomatoes and mix, add some fresh basil, and sprinkle on parmesan cheese.

And I ended up with this beautiful bowl of deliciousness:

Of course, there are plenty of unhealthy dessert type things you can make from scratch as well.  And you can bet we dabbled in that!  Nathan decided to conquer homemade desserts for my birthday, and it was a major success!  First, he made me a homemade Funfetti cake.

I can't tell you how he made it, but I can tell you that it was sugary deliciousness.  So much so that you need a glass of milk to eat it.  But on your birthday, you deserve to indulge. 

The other birthday surprise that he made me was just as yummy and delicious.  Not to mention super duper awesome.

Yes folks, that is butterbeer!  In mugs straight from Hogwarts (Thank you, Erika)!  If you do not know what butterbeer is, you need to brush up on your Harry Potter knowledge.  Suffice to say that it is sugar, cream soda, and more sugar.  Yum, yum, and more yum!

As of today, Nathan is officially in a shoe and back to work, so it’s back to cooking just a few nights a week.  However, I really hope we can keep this pattern up (although maybe more on the healthy side and less on the sugar coma dessert side).  We are both at a place where we need to get back into shape and get rid of a few extra pounds, and I think cooking more meals from scratch is going to help us get there.  So bring on the recipes, Pinterest!

I Heart Olympics!

I have been majorly obsessed with the Olympics the last couple weeks.  Maybe because it only happens once every four years.  Maybe because it’s the one time that track & field gets some well deserved attention.  Or perhaps it just has to do with all the good looking male swimmers walking around.  Suffice to say, I love the Olympics!

I love how every four years, the Olympics brings us new athletes to cheer for.  Last time, I got hooked on beach volleyball and cheering for Kerri Walsh & Misty May-Treanor.  This time around, I have become a gigantic Missy Franklin fan.  I totally admire how much she has accomplished and how mature she seems for being only 17.  Plus, she seems really genuine in comparison to a lot of other world-class athletes.  She even made me hate that stupid “Call Me Maybe” song a tiny bit less with this video:

 

2012 US Swim Team “Call Me Maybe” video from Dailymotion

 

(But only a little less.  The original version of that song really needs to go away, pronto.)

Another thing I love is Michael Phelps’ medals record.  People really need to stop hating on the guy.  They give him all this grief for not training as hard this time around.  If I won eight golds in one Olympics, I think I would find it very hard to get motivated too.  How can you top that?  As Nathan pointed out, an easy day for Michael Phelps is probably way more than any of us would ever attempt on a hard day of working out.  It is so impressive that he has accomplished that much, and I for one am very glad he was able to end on a high note and get some individual golds. 

I also have discovered a few new sports that could potentially spark my interest.  Say what you want, but I love any sport with a potential for a crash.  I don’t want people to get hurt, I just enjoy the excitement and unpredictability.  Take bike racing – totally boring . . . until someone wrecks, and they go down like dominoes! So you can imagine my joy when I discovered the individual canoe race through rapids.  Where they have to navigate swirling waters and go through gates!  Although nobody actually tipped a canoe (at least not when I was watching).  So, good for them.

Anywhoo, as much as I love the Olympics, I seriously hate NBC’s coverage.  For starters, they really need to re-evaluate their definition of “prime time”.  I don’t know what prime time is in other parts of this country, but in my house, bed time is 10 pm.  So I kind of have a hard time understanding how NBC can consider “prime time” to be from 8 pm to midnight.  And even at 8 pm, they spend two hours showing us prelims and diving, saving anything remotely interesting to air after 11 pm.  At which point I am asleep.

Another problem I have with NBC is Brian Williams.  I realize that this may seem like a very specific problem.  That’s because it is.  Brian Williams managed to bump himself up to number two on my most-hated news anchors list on the very first day of the Olympics (George Stephanopoulos is firmly situated at number one, in case you were wondering).  Call me old fashioned, but I don’t own a smart phone (yet) and I like to be surprised when I watch sports on TV.  Between that and this new idea of prime time, I am on about a 24 hour delay with the Olympics and avoiding all media and Internet (including People magazine website, which is seriously damaging my celebrity gossip knowledge.  Figures that stupid Kristen Stewart would break Robert Pattinson’s heart during the Olympics when I can’t read about it).  So I do not appreciate that while I am making all these sacrifices, I turn on the Olympics coverage, in the middle of which Brian Williams comes on live from London posing as part of the Olympic coverage team but is really there to do his dumb old evening news, and without warning announces that Michael Phelps has been crushed in the 400 IM.  He then justifies it by stating that the news has already rocketed around the world so he isn’t really spoiling anything.  HELLO BRIAN WILLIAMS?  THE NEWS HAD NOT ROCKETED INTO MY HOUSE YET.  I don’t watch the news, but if I ever start, it won’t be his.

My last problem (well, the last for now, anyway) with NBC is their choice of commentators.  Could someone please explain to me what Shaun White and Apollo Ohno have to do with the summer Olympics?  Not that I don’t love watching Apollo Ohno, but seriously.  Dara Torres or Michael Johnson would make a lot more sense.  I am not thrilled with John McEnroe as a commentator either, but at least he played a summer Olympic sport.  But the greatest offender of all is the alien robot posing as a human named Ryan Seacrest.  I say alien robot, because there really is no other explanation how one person could possibly work so many jobs and still have time to breathe.  Seriously, would you be that surprised if he was a robot sent here to take over the world?  First Fox, than E!, the Weekend Top 40, NBC.  Next up, ESPN, Facebook, and planet Earth.  Even if he does turn out to be human, I find it rather unbelievable that he ever participated in a sport in his life.  Therefore, I do not see any reason he can be considered a credible commentator.  I hated his interview with the Phelps family; I would much rather see a former Olympic athlete who knows the right questions to ask doing interviews like these.  If he ever shows up on Monday night football, I may have to boycott it.

But I guess in the end, NBC wins.  Because they are still playing stuff late at night and using useless commentators, and yet I am still watching.  Because I love the Olympics as much as ever, and probably always will.  Go Team USA!

Family “Funday” Sunday

My sister Erika is in town for one week before she moves to the East Coast for medical school.  She stayed with Nathan and I on Saturday night, and made us a delicious dinner of kielbasa, quinoa salad, corn on the cob, and French bread.  We even ate at the dining room table and had grown up dinner conversation!  How old are we?  It was a very relaxing and fun time.

Today, my parents, Erika, my brother and I all went to the coast for a day of family time.  We had a lot of fun, and surprisingly the weather at the coast ended up nicer than the weather at home.  First up, we hit Agate Beach so that we could all get a look at the dock from Japan (none of us had seen it except Dakota and Nathan).

We got there at just the right time, because shortly after the tide came in and you couldn’t get as close to the dock.  What Nathan failed to mention to me was that it was quite the hike from the day use area to the dock. 

And because I just couldn’t resist posting this last photo . . .

I also forgot that my parents’ idea of a day at the beach involves a lot more walking than mine.  So after that, we walked all the way to the rock that you see in the background of that last picture.  It doesn’t seem that far, but trust me, it is.  If you don’t believe me, ask the blister on my heel.

After we left Agate Beach, we drove through the Nye Beach area and stopped to take a look at the shops there.  We never realized they had shops down there.  There was a great little used book store, and also an Irish pub with outdoor seating that Nathan and I just might check out next time we are in town.

We ended the day in Old Town in Newport for some ice cream (yes, it was actually that warm there today), watching the boats come in.

It was a wonderful day, and so much fun to do something as a family.  Especially since Erika is leaving next week, and we won’t get as many opportunities to see her over the next several years while she is in med school.  We used to do family trips and vacations all the time, and the older we get the harder it is to get everyone in the same place at one time.  We certainly did miss our “Crabby Patty” (aka Jessica) and my better half today, but hopefully they can join us next time!

The Road to Recovery

Today was a very big day in our house.  Nathan finally got the pins out of his toes!  They were originally supposed to come out last week, but x-rays at that time showed that his toes weren’t quite healed enough.  So today was the big day.  He is now pin-less, in a new walking boot, and only using crutches as needed.  Needless to say, he is very excited to finally be moving around a little more and seeing some progress.

This last month has been quite a learning experience, for both of us.  As Nathan put it, he will “never take his toes for granted again”.  (He probably will also listen to his wife when she tells him that hopping on one foot up stairs is not a good idea and certainly will not lead to anything good.  That is, unless you consider face planting to be “good”.)  Obviously the “in sickness” part of our wedding vows came unexpectedly and much earlier than expected.  It was certainly challenging and stressful at times, but I feel like I have grown as wife.  Not only that, my brain cells have gotten smarter!  Thanks to this experience, I now know several new things:

1) It’s a good thing that I am not a nurse.

Because I would really be terrible at it.  I have not had any professional nursing training, so I can’t be sure, but I suspect that good nurses do not repeatedly bump the broken bones (on accident, of course).  Or kick them (also on accident).  Or drop sherbet cups on them (again, an accident).

2) How to connect the sprinkler to the hose.

And where to place it in order to water the lawn.  Also, that the hose is possessed and will spray water all over you when you attempt to turn it off.

3) Where to find painter’s tape at Home Depot.

That would be the second paint aisle. Not the first.  And apparently, it only takes a salesperson one glance to realize that I do not belong in Home Depot.

4)  The secret to Nathan’s homemade pizza.

One part of the secret is the ingredients.  Another part is the process.  And the final part is not overdoing it on the cheese, unless you want to fill your house with smoke and be forced to open all of the windows in ninety degree weather.  Obviously, I learned this the hard way.

5) How to take out the trash.

It seems like this would be fairly obvious and straightforward.  But it turns out, there is a method to the madness!

6) I can cook new things without using recipes!

Ok, fine.  One new thing.  But when you go from cooking two dinners a week to cooking seven dinners a week, you realize that you quickly run out of meal ideas.  Last night, I was feeling creative.  And tired of eating my same old garlic bread with premade Johnny’s Garlic Seasoning.  So I got creative with some butter, garlic powder, Italian seasoning, and mozzarella.  And voila!  I had cheesy garlic bread.  EDIBLE cheesy garlic bread.  SUCCESS!!!!

7) It is possible to take back our pop cans in a timely fashion.

Those of you who know us know that our garage is filled with bags, bags, and more bags of cans and water bottles.  My dad got tired of it and “tricked” (Nathan’s words, not mine) Nathan into taking back pop cans one day.  I have never been a fan of returning cans, especially alone.  But with some helpful nagging from my dear old dad, I went alone to take back cans one day.  And guess what?  It wasn’t so bad!  The trick is to go to Costco’s can return, and get there when they open.  Their machines always work (hint, hint, Safeway), and they even have a call button for when the bins get full!  I have made twenty bucks in the last two weeks.  (No matter that I probably still have forty bucks more in the garage).  PROGRESS!

8) My parents rock.

They took Nathan to doctors appointments, ran errands for me, and took back some of my cans.  They even installed a special showerhead in the now non-leaky master shower so that Nathan could take a shower easier without getting his foot wet.  I don’t know what we would have done without them.

9) My husband helps me a lot.

I knew he helped me around the house before.  But I don’t think I fully appreciated how much until he physically couldn’t help me.  He couldn’t kill the spiders, make dinner, carry laundry upstairs, or unload all the groceries from the car.  And that’s just the tip of the iceberg with what he helps me with.  I will never take his help for granted again!

10) And finally, my husband thinks I am a terrible driver.

See, normally he drives everywhere.  But for the last month, he has been at my mercy.  Apparently my tendency to drift, speed, and not use a blinker scares him.  I believe his exact words were, “You are the worst driver I know.  I never thought I would say it, but you are worse than Erika.”  (I am really not sure who should be more offended, me or Erika.  Erika says me.  But I am not offended.  He will eat his words when I become the next Danica Patrick.  You don’t need blinkers in NASCAR!)

* * *

Yes, the last month was challenging, but I am really grateful that we had this experience.  I think we will appreciate things more, and be better prepared to handle future challenges.  We still have a little ways to go on the path to recovery, but I am looking forward to things slowly getting back to normal!

Fourth Of July Fun

Yes, I know July 4th was nearly a week ago.  As you may have noticed by my lack of blogging, I am a little behind lately.  Besides, my neighbors are still shooting off fireworks.  So if they insist on doing that, I insist on sharing our 4th of July a few days late.

The past several years, the more ambitious members of my family have started a tradition of running a 10K called the Butte to Butte on the morning of July 4th (the less ambitious members of the family, aka my siblings, have always managed to find a reason to stay in bed).  First it was me and my parents, then Nathan joined in.  This year Nathan had to sit out due to all the broken toes, but my Uncle Rob joined the festivities.

For all you non-runners, a 10K is slightly over 6 miles.  The first mile of this race is all uphill, the second mile is downhill, and the last four are flat.

I love doing this run, but I am setting a disturbing pattern of being in worse and worse shape every year when it rolls around.  I don’t think I had run any farther than 4 miles since LAST July 4th!  This year, I ran the 10K in a little less than an hour, and only ten seconds slower than last year.  Not bad, except that I felt about ten times worse this year.  I felt great through four miles, but miles five and six kicked my butt.  As evidenced by this super flattering photo of my finish.

If it looks like I am running about two miles an hour at this point?  That’s because I probably am.  Nothing like pain to motivate me to actually attempt to be in shape next year.

Luckily for mom and dad, they photograph just as great as me.

The upside of this run is that it is a TON of fun, you totally get your money’s worth out of your entry fee (this year they even had barbecued hot dogs at the finish line!), and you get such a good workout that you feel no guilt whatsoever when you stuff your face later on in the day.  The downside is that you have to get up at the crack of dawn, and it hurts to move for several days after.  But that is a small price to pay for enjoying this later in the afternoon:

Ingredients: 3

Minutes to Prepare: 5

A Beautiful, Delicious Dessert: Priceless!

I would give you my secret recipe, but then I’d have to kill you.

The other great thing about July 4th was that summer finally arrived!  We had one glorious day of comfortable weather, and we enjoyed a fun, relaxing barbecue that afternoon with some great people.

Since then, the temperature has skyrocketed and I am contemplating a move to Alaska.  I am also contemplating using Nathan’s crutches to knock some sense into my apparently unemployed neighbors if they don’t stop setting off fireworks on a nightly basis.  Wish me luck!